The hardest truth to swallow is, sometimes, where you must go next
A poem
It’s soul-crushing.
Defeating.
Everything changes in one moment and you realize your whole story was a lie.
You scramble to find the good days when, at the same time, questioning for the bad.
Demanding they tell you.
When?
Where?
Why?? but… but… why…
And all of a sudden YOU are reduced to nothing. You are a small, hurt child inside.
Everything’s broken, nothing is fixable.
And yet you ponder the decision of forgiveness. It feels easier.
Maybe it is now. Maybe just until you feel better! When you are stronger! Yes, then you’ll leave!
But will you ever be stronger??
What if it happens again?
Worse, what if this new story was a lie?
What if everything about this new defense, this new reasoning behind “the why” is a lie? And to know would mean the world would fall away at your feet.
And you wouldn’t be flying.
Who is this person?
How are they here?
What did you do… what did I do to deserve this?
Will this hurting ever end?
Possibly I can remove it from my every waking thought. Push it back, away, to the recesses of my mind with time.
But it will be there.
The true haunting.
And to think I already thought that I trusted no one.
Sincerely yours, Teddie Voss
